What if we are all carrying invisible backpacks in our lives which weigh heavier and heavier as we grow older?
What if there were invisible stones of different sizes, shapes, and forms and which keep piling up in these backpacks?
The mind is a powerful force within our body, and if we learn how to use it appropriately, we can begin to empty our backpack and live much lighter in life. Every day you are walking around with an average of 70,000 thoughts per day. Of those 70,000 thoughts, only five percent are new. As our mind is wired to keep us safe and sound in our comfort zone, most of our thoughts stem from limiting beliefs from our childhood and past experiences accumulated throughout our lives. Each belief has an emotional charge and imprint, triggered as soon as the negative thought pops up.
The most important words you will ever speak are the words you say to yourself. The words you say to yourself are fuelling your thoughts, which lead to habits of thinking, behavior, and action. Every story has an energetic vibration. Every thought amplifies that vibration. So imagine if you are stuck in negative storytelling between you and your mind, your pulse is pretty low.
Why is that important?
You diminish your mental energy levels and emotional well being. Your thoughts are powerful. Now you may wonder how do I control my thoughts? How do I think healthier and happier thoughts? How do I change the way I think?
Before I share my insights based on science and work with my clients, let me first state that you will never eradicate negative thinking. That’s not possible, and that’s not part of being human. It is possible to start practicing more awareness of how your quality of thoughts influence the way you think, feel, and behave.
Here are three things to keep in mind to release your negative thoughts and step into your power.
Feel before you release
The triggering of our emotions is something we cannot control. Our brain observes the information first through our limbic system, the part that regulates emotions before it moves what is left of that information to our rational part of the brain. Much of what we perceive, like over 90%, gets distorted – deleted or generalized. It becomes an unconscious bias and is stored as automatic mental models which are triggered subconsciously. I will write about this in next month’s newsletter.
Understanding that these emotions are normal and are part of your natural functioning in life will help you feel them. When felt to its fullest extent, every feeling will pass right through you, and you will feel lighter at the end of the process. The alternative is harboring these emotions within you and creating blockages within your body. That’s where physical health issues start to appear! During the process of feeling your feelings, tell and remind yourself that these are impermanent, and this too shall pass. Once they pass, reflect, and observe what happened. The more you practice, the more you will learn how to monitor your emotions during the actual process of feeling them. That’s called a master in dissociation as you are no longer correlating your self worth with the momentary emotional experience.
Observe and don’t react
Practice observing your emotions rather than reacting to them. Meaning, whenever emotions of anger, fear, joy, happiness, love, lust, or whatever type of emotions are triggered, don’t engage, but observe.
- What thoughts am I thinking that are triggering these emotions?
- What precisely happened outside of my control that made me feel this way?
- What beliefs am I perpetuating that keep triggering these recurring emotions?
The more you practice and bring awareness to the triggering process of emotions, the better the quality of your thoughts will become. You will learn to choose ideas that feel better, are more empowering, and help you rise into your power.
The Image of the Self
Another exercise you can start with is looking at yourself in the mirror. What do you feel when you see yourself? What thoughts arise? Try not to engage or fall in the trap of judging yourself and how you look. Objectively analyze your thoughts and understand the image that you hold for yourself. If you have a negative self-image, that will dictate your relationship with yourself and others. You get what you think about it. The more you focus on your perceived negative qualities and aspects, the more you will meet and attract people who will reflect those qualities and characteristics back to you.
Developing a healthy self-image is essential to living life with an empty or lighter backpack as those judgemental thoughts no longer serve you. The longer you beat the drums of your past, the longer you will remain stuck in what no longer is your present reality. .
Let go of what your parents told you, your teachers, and other people. See their words as opinions and lessons learned. You now have the power and ability to start crafting a new self-image that feels empowered, loveable, and enough—a complete and whole self-image and who surely does not need any fixing because you are not broken to begin with.
Your self-image needs to hear nice words when it feels down or screws up.
Your self-image needs to hear how beautiful, unique, and powerful it is just by being.
Practice engaging with yourself in the mirror every morning, no matter how ridiculous it looks. Teach your children to do the same. The transformational effect of doing this more often is mind-blowing. Your body, soul, and mind will thank you for it. Release and rise!